“Never An Equation”

April 3, 2014

It really doesn’t seem like spring although it is early April. Getting use to this new computer as this is my second attempt with hopefully this time success. Just before I was in deep thought and for some unknown reason it disappeared. Perhaps aliens. Just kidding. The main difference between humans and animals is that humans have an intellect in which to think or reason and make choices. Society is quick to judge when a volatile act occurs. Humans and animals equate with a bond. Sometimes there isn’t a reason for these acts. Society as a whole may for unknown measures blame the acts on religion. This is never an equation. Sometimes these acts are equivocal. In cases of hatred it comes down to evil pure and simple. In history it is repeated throughout the ages not only in this country but in all regardless of where it is. No country has immunity. When someone has a physical illness they automatically are treated and eventually are on the mend. It should be the same way with mental illness. There is a stigma in society in general about this. It is very sad too. When someone has to go to war and fight for their country the person comes back with not only physical injuries but mental injuries as well. Let’s treat the whole person, not just the injuries that are visible. In some previous blogs there have been typographical errors. Trying to avoid this.

“A Culture”

March 25, 2014

It still is winter in my book. Still winter gear with all the fixings. Still mounds and some patches of snow on the surface, the air feels like snow. Although sunny skies avail that is tomfoolery with black and grey clouds. Intended to actually not blog again till next month, but after viewing a local report couldn’t let it go. It was reported that while driving while intoxicated the cop pulls you over and gives you a ticket, no jail time! This is a culture in this state, Wisconsin. Now this is speaking of alcohol, instead of having it called a dwi, it is called a owi. Now won’t go into that because it was well stated previously. The focus is why does the cop just gives a ticket! This is outrageous! How can this be! Then the upcoming offenses are many as less that five and more than twenty. This is a beer state namely Millers. All beer companies are saying time and time again to drink responsibility. So one can’t fault the beer manufactures for the stupidity of individuals. Just as you can’t blame the tobacco companies in N.C. and it is so big that two major cities are named after the companies. The state legislature has repeated tried to change the law regarding the offense. However to no avail, the beer lobby stands in the way each time the measure comes up for a vote. The beer lobby blocks and slams it down. This is very unfortunate. Look at the countless families who have lost individuals due to alcohol related accidents: not to mention the countless injuries. This is indigenous to this state. No other state in the nation but this state do this occur.


March 1, 2014

Spring is coming. No coats and hats. Bring on baseball. With balls and bats. Spring is coming. No more freezing to the core. Here comes natural warmth. And lots of strolling and more. Spring is coming. Four years ago I went to Maryland primarily to see my cousin Mike. Had a great time with him. Went to the Golf Country Club and enjoyed a lunch and conversation. Went to his home and saw his wife Susan, his son Mike and Brittany. Then when his birthday rolled around last year decided to phone him and he answered and he was very cordial as usual however didn’t seem like himself. I wondered and emailed my concerns to his son Scott in Talahassee. He said his dad was having trouble remembering things just a little and Susan mentioned the same concern especially when I voiced my concern in an emailed to her. Then I saw a photograph later that year and put it on my couver picture or facebook. Got a message from Mike, my cousin youngest son saying that he wanted me to remove it. At the time his Dad was being tested for Alzheimers disease. That there was a question that he had it. I understood completely and removed the photograph. Just had it there for a day of so. Told his son that I personally felt closer to his family and mine. And he understood. All is well with us. Then it turned out the my dear cousin has Alzheimers disease. Got a message from his daughter Brittany. Said her Dad has a good attitude and feeling cheerful. It is hard on the whole family though, understandably so. Speaking of family. My mother’s brother Cyril died at nineteen as a result of a motorcycle accident and her other brother Harold was married to Haddie and he was a guard in a D.C. prison. They had four sons. My mother would throw out names to me and names of people and I never would know who these people were much less meet them. That is why the Jecko side was far better than the Davis side. A sense of belonging. The conversation that I remember from my cousin is that he is a recent convert to being a Catholic and he recently went to St. Patricks and went to confession. And I recall the photographs of him and me as he held me tightly around the waist as I was glowing with pride. In fact I still have it. So memorable were those short days of sunshine. Spring is coming so hopefully I will get a new computer soon from Ian. This computer is very bad: in the middle of this it froze again and was just about to go up to the office and finished this. However decided against it again it is snowing now. Glad I didn’t. Have to work with it

“Slamming Against A Brick Wall”

February 4, 2014

At the moment I am racing against time, simply for the fact that my computer is going down to make it short and not to elaborate on it. Each and every time I try to find anything at all about my father’s side of the family, I keep slamming against a brick wall. There is nothing about that side, however knowing me I keep the research going. My sister-in law, Ellen sent me a card with a baby’s picture on it and it was a long gated one, which said ” Welcome Cole Davis into the family April 2007. Down below was written Jay and Claudia Douglass and big brother Reid. I kept this and put it away in my album for a period of time. Then my niece, Dara just ask me recently if I knew anything about Bert’s side of the family and if Bert had any brothers. I immediately said that Bert had a brother Maury and another brother Bobby. Then I was online looking for something else and came across an article which said” Rock Hill boy 4, fights to live” I then compared the card to the dates I had and as I was reading further into the article came to the conclusion that it was one in the same. The boy Reid was Cole’s older brother. It mentioned that Cole was 2.It mentioned that Claudia is Reid and Cole’s mother and Jay was the father. Claudia is my Uncle Bobby’s daughter. It was an emotional and inspiring piece. Reid had lymphomia cancer and needed a bone marrow transplant. There was several other articles referring to this condition or in connection with this family. So that is the essence of this blog.


January 15, 2014

First of all the previous blog’s title was suppose to be entitled” Multitasking”. That is really all right, because if you misspell a word, it could be that you didn’t hear it correctly, you say it rapidly and repeatedly and the words run together, or it is a case of dialect too. Peace is the absence of war as the slogan goes. There are fifty seven thousand American troops patrolling the demilitarize zone or the D.M.Z. in North Korea. This has been going on since the Korean War ended in 1953. In the case of North Korea the war is still being fought. In the administration of Eisenhower there is a Armistance Commission declaring a truce. However there has never been a peace treaty between the U.S. and Korea. The leader of N. K. is now a 29 year old dictator who is havoc on the people under his rule. Perhaps if the U.S. would finally pull the troops out and have a peace treaty with the North the entire country would come together in harmony. There’s opening dialogne with Cuba. That has taken a long time as Fidel Castro is still alive however his brother Raul rules the country. There should be dialogne with Mexico also, for that matter with P.R. and the Puerto Ricans should have the right to vote for President of the U.S. even though they have said that they really didn’t want it many years ago. At the time only 50 percent said no.However, I think the Puerto Ricans vote in general elections. Afterall they fought and died for the country: they should have the right to vote. The country should become the 51st state instead of a possession. Look at Guam for instance. The U.S. should have better dialogne with South American countries, all of them regardless. The U.S. talks about immigration. So what better way to accomplish this than to have better relations with neighboring countries including Central America too. Instead of isolating countries as they have done in the past.


January 13, 2014

Ok,It is quarter past three in the morning and I’m up ready to blog,now. Go figure! Computer has been forever slow which isn’t anything new. After getting uverse it ran the same. So I looked on facebook and each time I was on it the computer froze or the cursor did. Same thing it would show error messages. So I reduced the likes from 150 to now 73: that helped a slight. Then I erased some photos from my wall, went through all the articles mainly news in a general sense and deleted those which were many. In the meantime I was running scans and each time it can up with 53 objects of infection. So there were several scans maybe interferring with other scans. I had gotten a scan which came with uverse which was a complete waste. I deleted that, while still using Malware- Antimalware. I would run the malware scan daily and each time can up with the same amount of infections. Been running it since Christmas and just in the past week there hasn’t been any objects of infection. So that is a good sign. Develed into the computer and deleted items from 2005, and did the same with the documents. So that aided. It seems the computer would freeze on the social media or on a news site,however mainly on the former one mentioned. Got some presents from Ian and family. They were a calendar, a shirt with matching hat, a Christmas ornament and a hand crafted painted dish both from the Holy Land. The dish was chipped and splitted in shipping so kept it and will try to repair it asap. It is safe wrapped up now. Will end this for now.

“A Point Of No Return”

December 25, 2013

Winter being unique with ice storms, mounds of fresh fallen snow that glistens as tiny stars on the ground at night reflecting from the streetlights. Hearing Citizen Cope “Drummers Kick” knowing there’s a point of no return. Let’s backtract to the end of 2010. There it was beyond the beyond, bad getting worse and even worse. I would go to the grocery store and get items that I preferred. Then went into the fridge and they were gone. Knowing Carol didn’t swipe them, it was again the daughter. I ignored it once or twice but when it happened repeatedly, I voiced my thought and the daughter just rolled her large eyes without even an apology. And beyond that never replaced any of them. My eating and sleeping patterns were disruptive daily. I’d go down the basement to do laundry. There was growing mold in the adjacent room and particularly near the washing machine and dryer. There was not an attempt to make any repairs as I mentioned this problem to Carol. She was aware of it however did nothing. When I mentioned it again she said “I’m sorry” I thought to myself sorry doesn’t get it: this is unsafe. The daughter would be taking repeated baths at all hours. She would have outbursts anytime, screaming inside and out of the house. Carol and myself had locks on both our bedroom doors. I would lock mine even when it would be for a short or longer time. She did whatever she wanted, had no control and her parents never put any controls on her. I would leave the house at 6am walk up to the coffee shop, spend sometime there until Carol would pick me up between 10:30 and 11:00: she would drop me off at the mall or at Borders both on the Eastside, before going to her job. Then from there she would have another job on the southside. I would go there and read and relax until she was finished. It would be midnight when we both got back to the house. This was my daily routine. The more I was away from the house the better so she and I wouldn’t be there alone in the house. Oh speaking of my patterns I would take a showers only once a week, always when the daughter was gone. I would call Carol beforehand to see if it was safe. There wasn’t a lock on the bathroom door. Speaking of locks she broke the lock on my bedroom door. Then began stealing. I told Carol in January I couldn’t live there any longer. She said she agreed. I began calling apartments for rent. This place was hell on earth if there is such a thing and I think there is. At the house I started playing one against the other mentally, just for my own safety. I thought” I got myself into this situation, and I will get myself out”. It is amasing that these experiences are still vivid to recall. It is a test for my memory and for my survival.

” Waiting Till Time Was Right”

December 15, 2013

A suggestion to the growing homelessness is to count how many abandoned dwellings in this city and surely there are many, if not a few and refurnished them to a point of being habitable. Madison has thrown a ton of money into Randall Stadium for the love of football here. There should be more shelters particularly in the downtown area. At the beginning of 2009, it was the same yet getting worse. The house was literally cluttered with junk throughout. Closets were the same, with outdated cans goods, bags of rice from the food bank. The kitchen was horrendous. There was a new refrigerator and the food in it was spoiled. I had long conversations with Carol while she and I were hanging laundry on the clothesline in the back yard. She was working long hours as a caretaker and hardly at the house. So time was limited for her to do any of the housework. So I had an idea to help her out. She and I cleaned the refrigerator entirely. Actually I did most of it, while she was standing there. Her boyfriend was in a reggae band, so get the picture. He was all negative. Her daughter was a nut case. Getting the drift. The local police were at the house countless times for numerous things. It didn’t matter when. Seemed that the house was marked for bad activities. I debated with myself to move, yet thought my credit wasn’t up to par just yet. By being there I was building a good credit rating, so I continued to stay. Just waiting till the time was right. I would continue to stay to myself and i.m. my neices Lizzy and Jenny about the situation. They were both concerned for me. My son Andre would phone from Seattle and he too was concerned as were the neighbors. As 2009 came to an end and 2010 would come into the picture things were even getting intolerable.

“Year Upon Year”

December 13, 2013

Shockingly there are thirty three hundred homeless in Madison and half of them are children in shelters. There are twenty two thousand children who are homeless in n.y.c.: these people are only become a number to the rest of the u.s. population. These people are prisoners within their own bodies. It is a revolting fact. That even a single person is homeless and has to sleep in the dirt to keep warm against the elements. It is a crime against humanity. Now let’s scan back to 2005. After a scenic time on the roads, came at last to wisconsin to the capital city madison to a 3 bedroom,one bath small cape cod house. Arranging all my furniture in my small bedroom was a challenge and an accomplishing feat in itself. It looked good, with belongings in the closet and organisation to the tee. Then I went for a brisk walk to get myself acclimated to the surroundings. Each day I planned what was to be done on each day forward. Went to the coffee shop on Sunday mornings to hear some music which was relaxing. Went to the nearby park for a stroll next to the lake. On Tuesdays went to St. Paul’s Catholic Church downtown which was frequented by college students. Enjoy going to Mass: it brought solace then. Stopping at Subway which was adjacent to it. Then to the library a few steps away. On Thursday headed to Border’s on the east side for time to enjoy. On Monday the following week Carol called her x husband in n.j. to say I was here and to agree with expenses of the house. I spoke to Dan and with a conference call between Carol, Dan and myself, we came to an verbal understanding, nothing in writing that I would pay half the rent, utilities including water and the taxes which came twice a year. Thought to myself, it was a fair deal, as the three of us agreed. As the summer was well underway, I would mow the grass front and back, trim the bushes in the back yard with sheerers. The mosquitos were horrible because of the proximity to the lake. Summer went quickly into the leaves turning raking them and cold brisk winter. Neighbors with snow blowers, shoveling snow and bone chilling temperatures. With Christmas coming and the start of the New Year, I felt satified for some unknown reason. Got a new computer from Ian who was in Manila and sent it to me via Rick Jacobs. Andre was in Seattle. Spoke to him often. Soon it was spring of 2006 and I had been there a year. Hard to believe. Time went by in a flash. Then the summer and into the other seasons, Christmas came, New Year of 2007 and the seasons repeated. Holidays came and went. New Year 2008. Events and seasons again repeated into 2009. Went on facebook then connected with family, friends and starting blogging in August of that year. Had to get my thought revealed. Stayed to myself. Thought it was better that way. Had nothing whatsoever in common with the people were in the house. Seemed to me they were strangers. This was with the exception of Carol. Made a bad situation good.

“Out Of The Deep South”

December 11, 2013

Sunny bright blue skies, however still single digits high and below normal. Somewhat sounds like a weathercaster. Always interested in news and what is happening around the universe. After spending a two week visit getting a inkling of what was instore for myself just in case I wanted to make a permanent change of my own volition: I laid awake and thought long and hard. I arrived back in March of 2005, with a mind of scenic beauty, occasionally walking down by the lake at the end of the very short row of houses. Inside the house was a far cry to my expections, with several people coming and going throughout the day and sometimes during the evening. Thought to myself the mother who owned the house had a very large family. So I thought naturally there would be a great deal of friends along with relatives. Anticipating my move, I gathered up what was important and tossed the rest of belongings as went into an organisation mode. After several phone calls from the owner of the dwelling, she was anxiously awaiting my arrival as I was on the same path. It was a very friendly long conversation as were her long detailed letters. After much preparation on both our parts, the time had come. I rented a van. The neighbor from the next door apt., assisted me to put my furniture into the medium size uhaul. All the furniture, personal belongings, fit very well without crowding them and of course there was move to spare. This was in May of 2005 after a two months of deliberations. The manager of the four seasons was friendly, sad at the same time as my apt. was a model to others. Brenda wished me the best as she stood inside my apt. for the last time. Called Carol the owner of the house, she was apologetic b/c she was running late due to her working schedule. So we both agreed to make it on Saturday in May. I slept in an empty apt. There was a knock on the door, in early morning. Carol and her boyfriend came and asked me politely to use my apt. She and he slept in the empty bedroom and I slept in the living room. It was only for a matter of hours. I slept on and off in sweet reverie and was awaken by the bright sun shining through the window. That sun was my alarm clock. All three of us climbed into the van. Me on the passenger side, she in the middle and he driving. We stopped at McDonalds for something light with coffee, before the long scenic route to Wisconsin. We stopped at rest stops, restaurants, and in Ky near Mammoth Cave, but it was closed on a Sunday, so there was another nearby cave she and he went in as I stayed out and admired the surrounding sights.


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