Entry for September 30, 2007″Still Relaxing and Keeping Focus”

It is now nearly 11pm and at this very moment it is raining,thundering and some lightning. I am still relaxing and keeping focus.In the back of my mind it is two-fold.My sister Anne’s birthday and the day my husband died.Sometimes I don’t think about it; and then at times I do.Usually I say happy birthday to my sister. This year I didn’t but have a card to post for her tomorrow. I feel that the day is connected in some way as the years pass.It is matter of fact.Now for instance I wasn’t feeling this way the whole day;for when I think about it ;my mistake is to dwell on it. I don’t have a clue why I put myself through the agony. I will try my level best to stop that and carry on. Today I kept busy and did the rest of the yard work. I enjoyed it for the accomplishment.Talk about relaxing, when I think to much it is not good so I shall not do that in the future. Glad that this is the last day of the month and looking forward to many more years to come.Hopefully I will get to a point where the two events are not connected emotionally.Maybe, there are not maybes about it; it is a mere certainty the solution is to have another soulmate and that I am bloodly working to have.I shall continue this story;for I am racing against time. I have 10 min.to go before it is tomorrow,good job. Made it without any interruptions. Laughter is the best medicine.

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